|
[27 Apr 2004|06:12pm] |
Um . . .
What was wrong with Aidan today?
Must ask Will.
|
|
|
[23 Apr 2004|12:56pm] |
| [ |
music |
| |
"Abandoned Masquerade" - Diana Krall |
] |
I'm really bad lately about keeping this thing updated. >.<
Um, home from England, obviously. Which didn't turn out to be all that horrible, because Alice jetted over to smack some sense into her lesser son, allowing the greater to come home to his husband and daughter. :D
So . . . basically, all is right with the universe again.
. . . I don't know why I bother writing when there's nothing but Contented Happiness to record that nobody really wants to read because they can (rightfully) assume that's how things are in this house most of the time, anyway. :D
|
|
|
[18 Apr 2004|11:38am] |
| [ |
music |
| |
"Stop This World" - Diana Krall |
] |
In brief:
I love my Husband and his hot little body and I don't want to go home tomorrow because he won't be coming with us. >.< He says that it shouldn't be too much longer, that they're close to reaching a solution. He seems reluctant to discuss it, in a way . . . meh. It's because of Richard, anything having to do with him makes Will mad/withdrawn/angry. And rightfully so, because the older Foster brother is a WANK. Meh. I just hope they figure it out soon. Flying to England every other weekend for frantically desperate conjugal visits isn't cost effective.
We went out to dinner with Aileen and Rachel, of course. ;) They're having a fabulous time all by themselves. It's funny, I know Rachel must have her own friends, but she and Aileen just get along so incredibly well . . . I wish they lived closer together. They're good for each other.
They are NOT good for Will's credit cards, however. I know exactly what's in all those mysterious bags Aileen's been trying to hide in her hotel room. Prada. Hermes. Stilettos from Milan. >.<
P.S. Hee. Brought new Diana Krall CD for Husband, as a surprise. Going to spring it on him later. I must say, I'm highly anticipating his reaction.
|
|
|
[12 Apr 2004|07:47pm] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
 weird |
] |
| [ |
music |
| |
"La Donna e Mobile" - Luciano Pavarotti |
] |
I have the Best Husband Ever. :D
We talk every day on the phone, obviously, but I'd written him a few letters just because I felt like it, and he wrote me back. Got them today, and . . . I dunno, it's just cool. In his handwriting, and things. Love his words, obviously, he's the writer.
He wants me to fly out for the weekend.
As if he even needed to ask. This is ridiculous. If I can't be there with him constantly, I'm at least going to visit. Put this incredulous amount of money he seems to have amassed to good use.
(And he was being very naughty and smutty in his letter, so I think I need to go there in person and make him Behave. Yes.)
. . . um, in other news? I went to Aidan's on Saturday night to get drunk and watch Star Wars and . . . uh, I kinda let slip that I'd seen his trophies and jerseys and stuff in the wardrobe that one time. >.< So he was confused and then he was getting mad that I was snooping or something but I WASN'T, I really wasn't it was just an accident, but then I said something about being afraid to ask him about it and the look on his face was just . . . I don't know. I thought I'd be the last person on Earth who could have hurt Aidan McCloy's feelings, but . . . that's sort of how he looked. I don't know . . . I wasn't AFRAID to ask him about it, but . . . I didn't want him to flip out at me. He's so TOUCHY, and I don't want to fight with him. He's too important to Will, and he's MY friend, too, finally, after too long a time of NOT really being friends, and . . . now I think I might have fucked it up.
Should talk to him again. Ugh.
. . . and who's the new guy in the office? Is he taking over Metro?
ELEANORE! I need gossip, if you have the skinny.
|
|
|
[10 Apr 2004|06:41pm] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
 bizarre |
] |
Meh.
I've been feeling so incredibly MOPEY today. More so than I've been all week. Probably because I'm not at work, so I don't have stuff to do to take my mind off missing Husband. Bah. BUT! I had a nice, long (semi-smutty) phone call with him earlier, so I feel a bit more springy.
Aileen's out with Jessie and Aaron.
Hmmmmmm.
I think I want to get drunk. And I think I know the best person to do that with.
*calls Aidan*
:D
|
|
|
[07 Apr 2004|05:18pm] |
| [ |
music |
| |
"Hot White Come" - Liz Phair |
] |
Mopey.
Mopey mopey mopey mopey.
Will BE mopey until further notice.
So there.
:( Honestly. Come on, Norvald, let's be an adult. He'll be back soon. No need to act like a moody adolescent.
. . . >.< Can't sleep without him. Meh.
Okay! Plan to Improve My Mood! First, wait for Husband to Call. :D Then, invite Ellie over for ice cream to show her no hard feelings and to help her cathart over Lia. THEN, make immediate plans to get drunk with Aidan. Because if there's one thing that merits our co-intoxication, it is Will-absence.
Yes. This = Plan. *nods*
|
|
|
[06 Apr 2004|04:39pm] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
 blank |
] |
. . .
Will's leaving for England in the morning.
Shit.
I mean, the kids need him, and it won't be for long, but . . .
Never mind. Can't explain what it's like to be without him, even if it's just a little while. Would sound weird and clingy if I did.
Meh.
|
|
|
[05 Apr 2004|12:16pm] |
Will's busy, Marti's gone, Ellie's being snappy, Lys is absorbed in Aidan.
Caley? How 'bout lunch? ^_^
|
|
|
[04 Apr 2004|11:23am] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
 snuggly |
] |
| [ |
music |
| |
Will-breathing, Aileen-whining |
] |
Know what makes for a good lazy Sunday?
Cuddly Husband. :-D
Know what does NOT make for a good lazy Sunday?
Step-daughter badgering her sleepy snuggly Daddies to go shopping with her. Honestly. Like she NEEDS another designer handbag. Like father, like daughter.
I'm in the mood for a strawberry banana smoothie.
That is all.
|
|
|
[03 Apr 2004|06:19pm] |
Haven't updated this thing in a while.
Bah.
Things are a bit weird lately. Will's really busy, he's deluged with articles to write at work and he's got to have the final edit done on his new book by the end of the month, so we haven't really had much time with each other. He's always so tired when he gets home, it's dinner, bath, tea, and bed, and I'm not fit for much else, either. I've done FOUR photo shoots in the past week, all of which have to be developed and with prints ready for copy by Wednesday. I'm going mad.
At least things are good with Aileen. She and Aaron and Jessie had a little slumber party Friday night, which was fun. It's good to see her happy again. At least until the next teenage crisis breaks.
The real reason things are weird lately, though: Aidan. You know I saw that stuff in his wardrobe when we were there last weekend, and . . . well, I think I may have put two and two together. Like, why his knee is so fucked up and why he's so touchy about it. Maybe he got injured while he was playing and . . . man, that would really fuck somebody up, especially if what they loved doing was sports. >.< I really need to ask Will about it. I don't actually know the whole story, but I've felt kind of awkward around Aidan all week, like I know some big secret I have no right to know, though that's not really how it is. Maybe I just feel guilty because I was basically snooping around his closet.
Bah. I'm going to go make Husband stop working himself to death and give me a proper cuddle. *nods*
|
|
|
[28 Mar 2004|12:47pm] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
 a little ow |
] |
| [ |
music |
| |
"Hot White Come" - Liz Phair |
] |
Ow.
Okay, so. Hangover not TOO bad.
. . . ow.
Heh. Will's much worse off. He's carrying on like something's killing him. Aileen's taking care of both of us and muttering about how pathetic we are.
Aidan Can Cook, though. Who knew?
There was roasted chicken, and herbs, and things of that nature. I was very, very impressed.
Ow.
Um, what else? Hurts to squint at the screen to write this . . . OH, Will mentioned Star Wars at dinner and Aidan and I had to Not Look at each other so we wouldn't piss ourselves laughing because of this conversation we once had about Will and Princess Leia and the golden bikini . . . ahahaha . . . OW.
Guitar and Drink came out after dinner. Partook of both in great amounts. Lots of off-key singing and bad Python quoting. Those damn movies. Guess I need to sit down and watch them properly so I don't feel left out. :-p
. . . ow.
Um, something weird, though. Think I remember this right, anyway. When we were leaving, I went to get the coats out of the wardrobe, only they weren't IN the wardrobe, didn't realize that, but in the wardrobe there were all these jerseys and newspaper clippings and photos of Aidan playing football, Aidan running track . . . there were even a few trophies.
Weird. I mean, I know he likes sports, duh, that's what he writes, that's what he loves. Didn't know he ever played, though.
Wonder why all that stuff was hidden away in the wardrobe.
Must ask Will.
Once he's done yelling at the Sun.
*nods*
|
|
|
[21 Mar 2004|11:08am] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
great |
] |
1) Newsies is officially a me-and-Will Thing now, for reasons that won't be detailed here. ;)
2) Secret Window was SO GOOD! I mean, not Oscar-caliber or anything, but it was SO GOOD. Verrrrrrrrrry creepy. And Johnny Depp was Not Hot. No. No no no. Not. (I will not be hypocritical and have Pointless Actor Crushes when Will's Pointless Actor Crushes bother me so much. No. Won't. Um. *cough*). Apart from the movie, hanging out with Marti and Caley was great fun. They are HILARIOUS when they get going, I could hardly take part in the conversation because I was giggling so hard. We definitely need to make this a regular Thing, girls.
3) Need to call Lys and see how Aidan-Meeting-Family went. Also, Aidan mentioned something about dinner at his place NEXT weekend?
That is all. :)
|
|
|
[13 Mar 2004|03:26am] |
Insanity. Pure insanity.
My reading group ladies came over tonight for our meeting. So I was kind of stressed anyway, I started cooking as soon as I got home from work and against my better judgment I was doing my shrimp puffs for appetizers because, well, my shrimp puffs (which Will oh-so-delicately suggests I call shrimp-poufs in honor of the chef, for which he gets a thwap and a kiss, respectively) are of GOD and I know it :-D so, yes, shrimp puffs, which are fucking difficult to make, I might add, so, culinary stress. Will decided to hang around tonight and make us all tea since we weren't discussing Fortin (tonight's topic was Danielle Steele, Answered Prayers, A NEW CLASSIC) which I was glad of because, heh, well, because I love him and I want him around and ALSO because I like bragging about him and getting to show him off to these ladies, my friends, who are JUST as dirty and gossipy as he and HIS mother, so really it's quite fitting. So he was helping me (by keeping me company and NOT helping me cook) and then everyone started arriving and chatting and I was still cooking but Will played Good Host like the fantastic Husband he is which he will get much sex for later. Anyway, I was taking a break from my oven-vigil when AILEEN came back in from shopping, she'd gone out for a walk and a trip to Macy's because she was feeling mopey, anyway I HAD FORGOTTEN TO TELL HER ABOUT MY LADIES COMING, so they swooped down on her wanting to know about school and life and BOYS, and I knew she was having Issues about that Justin boy and I could tell she really didn't want to talk about but you know gossipy middle-aged women (and gay men), they just WON'T QUIT sometimes, so I was trying to break through the gaggle, wanting to get her away before they could upset her or anything because God knows she was shocked enough to come home and for all of them to be there. And then Mrs. Lancaster popped the question: "Well, DEAR, aren't there any nice hunky young dancer boys for you to, uh, DALLY with? *cue hysterical giggling*" And >.< Aileen lost it. She dropped her Macy's bags right there on the carpet and went to pieces, blubbering about Justin, which REALLY isn't like her, she doesn't like crying in front of strangers (or ANYONE for that matter, she's like her father in that respect), and she started blubbering everything about Justin and how he wants to date some blonde slut at her school named Katy or something and my ladies are sitting there flabbergasted like they've never seen someone CRY before, and Will was tugging on my shoulder saying something but I wasn't paying attention because I was trying to console A and herd off into her room at the same time. This, of course, is when the doorbell rings and Aileen's standing closest so she automatically goes to answer it even though she's a sobbing mess and who should be there but Aaron and Jessie, and for a minute the three of them just stand there looking at each other, Aileen still sniffing, and I guess there was some sort of weird teenagerish telepathic apology because after a minute all THREE of them started crying AGAIN and hugging and blubbering about how sorry they all were for everything and STILL my ladies are sitting there silent through the spectacle and I wanted to say "Yep, you guessed it, welcome to a typical Melodramatic night in the Foster household," and then Will was still tugging on my shoulder and I guess I didn't answer because then he PINCHED me which is DANGEROUS so I spun with the intent of saying something along the lines of "not in front of all these dirty old women, they'll get off on it," but that wasn't it, he was pushing me toward the kitchen and that's when I realized MY SHRIMP PUFFS, MY GLORIOUS SHRIMP PUFFS, WERE BURNING.
Suffice to say, the rest of the night entailed a lot of consumption of alcohol by everyone involved, minors included. GOD.
But! Aileen's made up with her friends. :) I guess what I said to Aaron paid off, or maybe they just decided to stop being ridiculous on their own. Either way. As long as she's happy again.
****
Also: I really shouldn't be awake still because we're getting up early in the morning (as in, THIS morning, in a few hours) to go upstate to Tess's grave because it's her birthday. I know I've said this already, but it means a lot, weirdly, that he wants me to be there, that he needs me to be there. I used to feel like Tess, that grief-part of him, was something separate and enclosed that I couldn't touch or alleviate. Not that I'm saying I now feel like I can make him not hurt, because I won't ever be able to do that completely because he will always always miss her, and so will Aileen. What I mean is, it's important to me that he's SHARING that hurt with me, letting me take part of it, take part in it. And, even in death, Tess was/is so important to this family that . . . I don't know, being involved with her memory like this makes me feel more a part of the family, too. Connected to her by proxy. Which may be a weird and morbid thing to feel, but, eh. I'm just being honest.
Sleep, now. Honestly.
|
|
|
[11 Mar 2004|06:11pm] |
For one thing: Husband is mopey and quiet. I am Worried. Maybe I can tempt him to Talk with tea and cookies. It's worth a shot.
For a second thing: I need to talk to him anyway because tomorrow night my reading group is coming over. Just in case he wants to flee. ;)
For a third thing: Um, sort of weird. I wrote that I saw Jessie the other day and didn't say anything to her about Aileen being so upset over this fight of theirs. Why didn't I? Because that's the kind of parental interference that I HATED growing up, which is why I never told my parents anything. So I was trying to butt out. But A is still . . . meh, she's still so unhappy over it, which makes ME unhappy. Anyway, to make a long story short, I saw Aaron at the market today. He saw me, too, and he sort of half-acknowledged me . . . I don't know, maybe he felt weird seeing me since he knows Aileen's probably been venting venom about their ridiculousness at home. And, again, my instinct was just to butt out.
And we all know how long that instinct lasts, compulsive peacemaker that I am.
So I went over to him. It wasn't a big deal, I didn't get melodramatic and Dadly or anything. I just told him straight up that he and Jessie were being ridiculous and really hurting Aileen's feelings and ought to consider how GOOD going to the Academy has been for her rather than make her feel guilty about it by proxy for guilting her about quitting the ballet class. And then I left.
>.< I sort of wish I hadn't, because now it'll be "Aileen's psycho step-dad cornered me at the market!" probably, and if that gets back to her she'll be pissed at ME, but . . . eh. I couldn't just NOT say anything, because I don't think they get how badly her feelings are hurt over this.
When did I get so wrapped up in Aileen's life?
. . . probably around the same time that MY life became comfortably Non-Angsty. :)
|
|
|
[08 Mar 2004|10:17pm] |
Weekend?
Weekend very good. :-D Will said today that we should invite Aidan and Lys over more often, and I wholeheartedly agree. We had a blast. Husband and his McCloyish counterpart got ridiculously (and predictably) hammered and started in on the Monty Python quoting.
Lys and I retaliated with Les Miserables and Evita, among others.
There was a lot of noise in the Foster-apartment, needless to say.
It was good to see Aileen laughing and smiling, too. She's seemed happier ever since we talked about Stuff, but this is the first time in a while she seemed REALLY genuinely happy.
It's funny. I saw Jessie downstairs this morning. I've always got on well with her - with ALL of A's friends, really - but she looked away, sort of. Acted embarassed. Which, from the sound of it, she should be. Aileen can't help that she's too tired to keep up all the extra work needed for their dance class. I almost wanted to catch up to her and say something like "cut A a break, this not-talking is really hard on her, especially right now when she's feeling Angsty about this silly boy and she needs a best girl friend to talk to more than a Daddy."
I didn't, of course. But I wanted to.
But we're digressing. Great weekend. Will's hangover wasn't nearly as bad as usual. Maybe he's beginning to build up a tolerance? This could be a good OR bad thing. The jury's still out.
****
Post-Oscars = a decrease in the workload for the Entertainment department. Which means I'm not running around like a crazy man setting up photo shoots and getting things developed and sent off to Copy at last minute and generally losing my mind. This week's big project is a photo shoot with Johnny Depp, John Turturro, and Maria Bello for the premiere of Secret Window. This'll be my second time photographing the illustrious Mr. Depp; first was over a year ago, for the Terry Gilliam documentary. My first assignment on this job. Oh, nostalgia.
. . . heh. I wonder if Marti knows I'll be up and close personal with Johnny himself. I should go tease her about it. :-D
****
Random: Will and I had a good Talk today. :) About my ex-boyfriends, really about ex-boyfriends in general and why things don't work and how we know REAL love, like what we have, when you finally get it. I don't know, I hadn't been thinking about it, but he made me show him an old picture of me and it reminded me of the time in my life when I was with Jonathan, and . . . well. Angsty memories. I try not to think about my old relationships, particularly not Jonathan because the way that ended WRECKED me and what I did afterward - getting engaged to Juliana, pretending, hiding for almost two whole years - well, it was such a huge mess. Why I got sent to New York in the first place, when I finally came clean, no pun intended, and embarassed myself and Juliana and my family and everyone else in high Seattle society.
Blah, I didn't mean to go into all that. The point is, we had a good Talk. :) I forget sometimes how easy it is to just TALK to him. To just say whatever I'm thinking or feeling and be able to take for granted that, at least of the time, he GETS it. That's a powerful thing, I think. Powerful and rare.
Which is why I never intend on losing it or letting it go. :-D
Far too much tea. Time for bed.
|
|
|
[04 Mar 2004|08:07am] |
Aileen and I finally got to talk some yesterday. :) I was making cookies for my reading group, so I got her to help me, and . . . it was good. Reconnecting a little bit, anyway. She's all for a family date, so that'll happen sometime in the near future.
She's been really upset, apparently, because Jessie and her other friends from her old dance class are pissed that she's giving it up. :-/ I told her they'd come 'round eventually, which they will, but still. She doesn't need that drama on top of school. Plus, she's having man-troubles, but then, who isn't? (Except me :-D). I was worried for a minute, actually, that she'd . . . >.< SLEPT WITH this Justin kid, but she told me she hadn't, and I believe her. It's just a case of she likes him more than he likes her and whatnot. Ugh. I wish she could find somebody who would give her back all that she has to give. Someone like G was with her. Only . . . you know, HER age. >.<
So, yes. That, plus a relatively low-stress week at work so far, plus a randy bout of shower sex with Husband last night are all adding up to make my day pretty good. :-D
Aidan's bummed about some hockey thingummy or another. I think I'll take him some coffee.
|
|
|
[01 Mar 2004|11:06am] |
I'm a terrible Daddy.
Well, not TERRIBLE, but I'm not really great right now, either. I know Aileen's having some problems at school or with friends or . . . SOMETHING. Don't ask me how I know, I just do. I can tell by the look on her face when she thinks I'm not looking at her. And I keep meaning to talk to her, because we haven't had an actual talk in ages, but . . . well, first there were Anniversaries and then there was Oscar work and going out with Lys and consoling Ellie through her spat with Lia and I don't know what all, and I LOVE that my life is busy and that I have so many great people in it who are there for me and that I'm there for, but . . . I miss my step-daughter.
And I'm worried about her.
:-/
. . . Will? I think we need a family date.
|
|
|
[19 Feb 2004|02:59pm] |
Valentine's Day, First Kiss Anniversary, randomly lusty pouncing . . .
My marriage is a lot of Fun lately. :-D
****
Actually, related to that, I'm sort of worried about something.
I mean . . . with ALL these sappy romantic milestones, like Valentine's and the Anniversary and whatnot . . . well, Will and I have been sort of wrapped-up in each other. Which, you know, is a GOOD thing (not that you need to hear it again, but GOD I am so ridiculously in love with that man, even if he does drive me crazy sometimes :-p) in some ways, but in another way . . .
It's like we're falling into that pattern again where we get really into each other for a long stretch and sort of forget that we're a FAMILY, not just a couple. Meaning that I can't remember the last time I talked to Aileen.
And that makes me feel like crap.
Granted . . . it's partially her fault, because things never really got resolved between us after that fight about moving. Will and I just sort of agreed to let it drop for a while and she and I have been nice to each other but . . . our thing, our dynamic, our friendship is still not back to normal. I'm sure that's not helped by the fact that I've spent most of the last week making her Dad forget how to breathe properly or stand upright, and BEFORE that things were just so crazy with planning the party and work and I thought she was still mad at me anyway . . .
Bah, this is ridiculous. We NEED to talk. Not only about the moving thing, because that's still going to happen whether she's going to throw tantrums or not, but also about HER. I've no idea what's going on her life, and that's . . . it's a horrible feeling. :-/
****
Related, but back to the vein of subject matter first introduced at the top of the entry: Husband and I are planning a short weekend getaway in my Sex Car next month after the Oscar mess is over. Probably south, to the mountains. "Come away with me and we'll kiss on a mountaintop . . ."
|
|
|
[16 Feb 2004|01:08pm] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
bouncy |
] |
Just a few things.
1) I hope everyone had as great of a Valentine's weekend as I had. :-D
2) WORK IS CRAZY TODAY. I've spent all day in the darkroom, I'm starting to feel afraid of real light. >.<
3) Sort of random: I miss Aileen. :( I mean, I see her lots, but she's always so busy or so tired or going out with her friends. We've not had a real chat about Things in a while . . . eh, not since she got mad at me about the Moving Thing, which we STILL haven't discussed again. I think she thinks I've just let it drop, but I haven't, because Will and I still WANT to, but . . . meh. Need to talk to her, and need to Talk to her. Two very different things. Maybe I'll bring some mint chocolate chip ice cream home and bribe her into chatting. :-D
4) VERY IMPORTANT. Tomorrow, February 17, is technically mine and Will's Anniversary. :) As in, one year to the day since That Conversation and our first kiss. Soooooooooooo . . . being the good Husband that I am, I have a special treat planned. :) One of his favorite French films is Jules et Jim, so I managed (with some monetary expenditure >.<) to rent one of the little arthouse theaters downtown for tomorrow night. They're playing the movie, just for us. Just him and me and the dark theater and the screen. :) Very romantic, I think. Aaaaaand then, it's back to his office at the Journal for a little nostalgic making-out. :-D
Gah. Valentine's and Birthday and now this . . . so much Sap. :) I'm going to be a useless sappy madly-in-love fool for the next couple of weeks, you shouldn't even bother trying to make me be coherent. :-D
|
|
|
[14 Feb 2004|09:58am] |
OW.
That is all.
Not ever drinking again, EVER.
Stupid stupid stupid. Must . . . recover . . . equilibrium. There is Valentine's Mushiness to be bestowed on Husband.
. . . just as soon as my head stops EXPLODING EVERY TIME I DRAW BREATH.
>.<
And if Aileen doesn't turn down that fucking Noise she calls music, there's going to be murder in the Foster-home.
OW.
Happy Birthday, babe. :-D
. . . it hurts to smile.
OW.
|
|
| navigation |
| [ |
viewing |
| |
most recent entries |
] |
| [ |
go |
| |
earlier |
] |
|
|
|
|
![[info]](http://l-stat.livejournal.com/img/userinfo.gif){kind=small}
noel_foster's journal